Delhi>Mumbai...Ha ha...Nice Joke

Over the past week, I saw that my visitor count was rather high, and on checking the logs, I came to know that quite a few people had come to my blog, by searching for Delhi Metro on Google Blogsearch. I am quite happy actually...atleast visitors will not go away disappointed, like the ones who come here searching for weird poetry...(Try it: Searching for some weird Topic+poetry & my blog is within the first few pages on Google, with a pagerank of just 4). So I decided to find out what else they were reading.

Firstly this Blog post (http://www.sprangleblog.com/?p=61). It's written by a certain Joe Harkin who appears to be from the US. His views and observations are quite interesting. And just read it for kicks.

Secondly, a Guy called Kartik Kannan has put up some pics, the first of which is rather interesting. Cleo had told me about a similar vandalised sign she had seen. I don't know whether she saw the same sign, or that he was a serial defacer, who goes around the metro leaving his mark.

Thirdly, this post by some looser who claims to be a journalist, but has no sense of judgement or ethics. He has put up pics and then writes at the end that taking pics in the metro is banned, and one should not take them. Further more the blogger writes:

This world-class transit system has upped Delhi's prestige and in my opinion has helped it replace financial hub Mumbai as India's hippest city.

It was on reading this sentence, that I was forced to blog.

This is a classic case of what is called a non sequitur.

Ok, the Delhi metro is better than the Mumbai locals by certain narrow parameters; but that's pretty much it. How does having a metro that closes down by 10:30 in the night, make your city a hip place???

I didn't want to make this a Delhi v/s Mumbai post. As Prashant Parikh says on a particular community on Facebook:

I'm SICK of ppl comparing the 2 cities, isn't the answer OBVIOUS?!?!?!
It's not that Delhi is a BAAAAAD place, it's just that Bombay is so much better!

See, when I usually say that Mumbai is better than Pune or Delhi, I usually mean that it is more convenient. I know it inside out; don't have to think at all while doing anything... So it's easier, and more convenient. I'm sure that when a delhite or any other outsider visits Mumbai, he or she too, will be confused by the system, and will prefer their home town. But one should also remember that when we talk about anything, we do that using our subjective background. So when I compare Delhi to Mumbai, I am doing it because, that is the only reference point or control I have.

Just as I understand that saying Mumbai is better than Delhi would be unjust, the converse too would be incorrect. Just having a Metro in certain parts of the city, and big wide roads and 12% canopy cover, do not make a hip city. What makes a city hip is being free to do what you want to.

• Being free to go out whenever you want to, and being confident that you will get food to eat.
• Being free to open your mouth and say what you want to.
• Going out at whatever time of the day or night, without being concerned of your personal safety.
• Knowing that, gods forbid, some calamity fell on you, people would readily help you.
• Knowing that people generally help you without exploiting you.

It's things like these that make a city hip and liveable.

Delhi Vignettes - 1

After two weeks in Delhi I have sort of settled down, and stopped being shocked by the varieties and the idiosyncrasies that this city has to offer.
As a Mumbaikar, the most striking fact is the pace of the city. In Mumbai, we are used to the fast pace, where time is very valuable, and everyone tries to do things in the most time efficient manner. Be it the shopkeeper who directs a boy toward you if you are standing idle in his shop, or the Auto driver who takes the money and gives you change in a flash, everyone is quick and nimble. P.L. Deshpande had written in one of his short sketches, that for a Mumbaikar, the watch is attached not only to his wrist, but also his destiny. When I told a co-worker that I was from Mumbai, the first thing that she said was 'Life bahut taze hota hoga, naa.' I don't know whether our life is fast, or theirs is slow, but the relative difference is striking.

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I happened to travel by the Delhi Metro, this Friday. Now the Delhi Metro is matter of prestige for most delhites. When I had told some expatriate Dilliwalaas that I would be in Delhi, the first thing most had said, 'You have to travel by Metro'. Whenever some foreign Dignitary comes-a-calling, they are shown the Delhi Metro as a symbol of India's Development. I wonder what they think about it. They must be wondering, 'These Indians call 'this' modern? Then they are behind London by almost 120 years.’ What did I think, you ask? Frankly speaking, I am not at all impressed.
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As a Mumbaikar, I am used to long distance mass transport being a challenge. The Indian Railways must have decided that since Mumbaikars do not have much time for exercise, their daily commune should involve a sufficient quantity of it. This will lead to a fitter citizen and a healthier life. The Metro people here have no such lofty aims.
When you want to go up, you have the option of an escalator. Paying the fare and buying a token involves standing in a line for hardly any time. As you wander in the station, you don't have to raise you hand either to your eyes or nose, to avoid your senses from being offended.
There are markings on the platform which tell you where the doors of the coach will stop, and how you have to stand. When the metro train comes, you gather at the sides of the doors, and wait for them to open. Once they do, then people will come out from the centre, while you enter from the sides. In about 30 seconds (30 seconds??? the local trains in Mumbai stop for barely 11 seconds) the doors close, after an audible warning. This is what disappointed me the most.
You cannot show off you simian characteristics, which survived so many million years of evolution. I am of course talking of 'Hanging out’. This is the most fun part when travelling by locals, back home. Also you cannot show-off your feline skills, by rushing off to the closest available forward facing Window seats, due to the very absence of such kind of seats. Further more, vertical distance between the platform and coach is hardly 1 cm, while horizontally it is about 4-5cm; something that will hardly be called a gap by a Mumbaikar.
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The announcements however, are as funny as in B'bay. There we have the announcers asking us to 'Pay your attention' like it some extortion money we have to dole out. Here you have a male voice in Hindi, and a female voice in affected English, talking to you while you are travelling inside the coach. They help you out by telling you which the next station is, implore you not to litter the stations, and remind you to save you limbs by staying away from the doors. The female voice at times tells you to 'Please mind the gap.' This is the aforementioned gap. Methinks they should say 'Please don't mind the gap' since it is so small. The passengers are also warned to take care of their valuables, since ‘Pickpockets have been identified in the coaches’. I wonder that if they have been identified, why they haven’t been arrested as of yet, and instead allowed to roam free.
There is however a nice egalitarian result of the Metro. There is only one class, and no ladies or handicapped or luggage compartment. Everyone travels by the same class. You will see laptop toting executives and cloth bag carrying dehatis besides each other, hanging on to the same hand support, which like always, comes at my cheek level, threatening to destroy my eyesight.
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The food is going to be a problem. I am used to blazing through the day with only a couple of Vada-pauws and a cola, in my stomach. Lunch here consists of proper Punjabi Veggies, deep fried is the most cholesterol high oil, to be eaten with Roties covered with a thick layer of butter. No wonder I feel so sleepy in the afternoons.
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I visited Rajiv Chowk at CP after ages. It is now totally changed. The Rajiv Chowk Metro Station is underground, with two lines crossing; So It happens to be the largest station, or so I am told. For this they had to dig the Chowk up completely (as seen from the Google Maps) and they totally redesigned the garden. It now has beautiful walkway, manicured lawns, Powerful fountains and a nice open Air Amphi Theatre.
I also happened to dine at Nirula's. The standards seem to have fallen. I was looking forward to pigging out like I did along with Zulfikar back in 2001, but the first dish I had, itself was disappointing. I had asked for a footlong, and I got something that resembled a Long Pizza, with the mushrooms being dry and the cheese being chewy and not at all creamy. Nirula’s seem to have lost their identity, post their takeover.

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In case you think I am being too harsh on this city, please remember that this is the Vindictive and arrogant Opinion of a pure thoroughbred Mumbaikar, on seeing a superior city. When you come to Delhi, you feel like you have come to the 'Rajdhani'. Be it the elegant curves under the flyover for U-turns, or the sparkling lines of led's on the road dividers or the uniform Urban fixtures, or traffic signage that actually makes sense, all make you feel like you are at a Special place. Infact I'll go so far as to say that if you have a place to stay, there is nothing like Mumbai, and if you have accommodation and your own vehicle, there is nothing like Delhi.
On an ending note...You feel the grandeur and the royal heritage of the city, the moment you land here, either at the railway station or the airport, when the Auto-wallas claim astronomical sums for short distances.