The Chromology of a One-Night Stand.

Now all of you know that I am a Google Fanboi , and how much of a techno-geek I really am. It’s no wonder then that I often get a nerdgasm whenever Google comes up with a really big announcement.

This time it was slightly different. We heard of Chrome from Philip’s blogoscoped on September 1. Geeks all over the world rejoiced at the sneak peek at the newest girl on the blog, Chrome. She came from a royal heritage. She was from the House of Google, no less.

And what striking features she had …

Each of her tabs had its separate process. So when one of those would irritate you, you could just close that one, and she would carry on like nothing happened. She was very forgiving.

She had an all-new way of working with Javascript. Not only could she last longer with the Javascript, she was way faster than any of her competitors. You could take her to digg, and she would live to tell the tale. She would still Obey you and do your bidding, long after the other prospects had given up, all tired and confused.

She was also discreet. She had an “Incognito” mode, where she promised you total secrecy. Whatever happened there would remain between you two. She wouldn’t gossip about it to others, nor remember those things, and use them against you, at a later point. It was like every Guy’s dream come true.

What was most hearting to see, was that she was very easy on the eyes. She loved exposing herself, and had the largest area where you could play and surf. While you were required to turn on others, before you could this with them, Chrome was always in this state, every ready to fulfill your wishes. She wasn’t all decked up, in useless frivolous things, and had a minimalist look on life.

What turned on every geek who heard about her, was that she was Open Source. This was the highest possible qualification, anyone could have, and all geeks began to dream about her.

I was no different. She had tickled my interest, and now there was no going back. I had to have her. I wanted to play with her and I wanted to make her mine.

I hung around Google, all day and Night, waiting for her to make an appearance. I would relook for her every 5 minutes, but she was nowhere to be found. I left Office, dejected.

I reached home, and decided to try my luck once again. I was lucky. I saw that she had just made an appearance, and snatched her, and brought her, close to me.

I still remember, how I approached her with trepidation. I wasn’t sure whether all my dreams would be fulfilled, or I would face disappointment. When I introduced my self to her, I realized that she already knew me. She had taken down all my details, from her friends already residing on my HD, and was ready to do my bidding.

What they had said about her was completely true. She was so different from all the others I had experienced before. She was so beautiful, and without the fuss. I fell in love with her. She made me feel young again, and I felt as if I was experiencing the World Wide Web for the first time. I was so happy. I thought we would last forever.

Being the Nice-Guy that I am, I acted like …well a nice and normal guy. I did what a normal User would do. Read my email with her…took her to youtube for a few Indie Movies, read some news, heard some gossip on Eonline.

I thought I was set for life.

Then I decided to stretch my luck. Asked her to do a few things that I really wanted to do. I took her to facebook. Showed her who my friends were. That’s when I decided to write something on the wall of a Hot girl I knew. But Chrome straight away refused. Not that she gave me any reason…she just didn’t do it.

I took her to a site with RSS feeds, but she was confused with it. She just didn’t know what to do. My immense happiness of just a few minutes earlier, was disappearing into thin air. I decided to call it a night.

Maybe she was not comfortable with the surrounding, so I decided to explore her on my other two computers. Here too, she refused to do anything out of the ordinary. She was just a plain girl, who had the appearance of being hot and happening. She refused to do anything exotic. My dreams were shattered.

I decided to give her a last chance, in Office. I tried to get her to me, but I had to jump through hoops to get close to her. She found the environment very restrictive, and refused to be flexible, and listen to me. She went off on a repetitive drool about how she could not do this or that, but refused to hear me out, on solving the Issue.

Nor could she take extensions, like my old girl, firefox…I realized that we were over. It was time to call an end to our relationship, when I still had some respect for her. It was a roller coaster ride with her; The supreme Happiness of getting the things I have always dreamed about, and the depths of despair, on not being able to do things, I was used to doing everyday.

Chrome, you showed me a lot of dreams, and successfully achieved them with me, but you could not do a few simple things, that I really want. I’m so sorry…It’s not you, It’s Me. I hope we can be a couple some day… Till then, on lonely nights, when I am all alone, I will hear the wind…and think of the night we spent together.