Control is freedom?

I subscribe to one of those greeting sms services, and usually get some cheesy line to read in the middle of my sleep. There was one message, which however has been troubling me for the past two weeks. And I mean that in a good way.

The message said: Always remember that Self control leads to freedom. Now that sounds quite Orwellian. I can see it nicely mix with the party’s slogan. War is peace! Freedom is Slavery! Ignorance is Strength. Now if you just add: Control is Freedom; no one would bat an eyelid.

The reason why this has been such a thought provoking point for me, is that it is sort of my mantra; I just hadn’t put it into words, and this message completely clarify my thoughts. Let me try to explain this paradoxical concept. One would wonder, how in the name of God, can Self control, or ‘holding oneself back’ be equal to freedom?

Let us look at most people, who I know, who keep moaning about life. These are the same people, who do not think about what they are doing, neither are they concerned about the repercussions of their actions. They often find themselves draw into situations, which cause them a lot of grief. They find their options to be limited, and are constricted in their future course of actions.

Now these are the same people who blame me, for being too ’rigid’ or something like that, and claim that I cannot experience all that life has to offer me. Later in the conversation, when they tell me their problems, and ask me for advice, I often give them several options. (Most of which are based on the plan of action I would undertake, if facing such a situation). They would then dismiss these options, saying that they won’t be able to do it, for various reasons. Who has less freedom in this case? Who is being held back?

One can claim that to be truly free, is to be like a cut Kite. If you believe that to be true, then you must also be prepared to be torn in parts, dragged anywhere without your choice, and being subject to forces, beyond your control.

I do not feel that this is what freedom is. Freedom is the ability to have the entire world open before you. You must break free of the shackles and restraints that situations put on you. For this, you may need to put some shackles on yourself. The benefit of these self-made restrictions is that they pain a lot less, and lead to fewer frustrations, and feelings of impotency.

Why is it, then that so few people agree with me on this? I feel this is so, because, it is not easy to set limits, and follow them. You require great strength, when nothing is stopping you from breaking your own rules. The limits, and just imaginary lines, no one will know if you cross them, except for you. One can get weak, and give in to temptation; though this path is simple, it definitely is not easy.

I’ll just like to add a small clarification at the end. Self-control does not mean lack of spontaneity. It does not imply that you cannot flow like a paper boat, on the river of life. All it means is that you are in control of path you take, on the wonderful journey called life.